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I woke up but laid in my bed, watching the tv that I always have on. My mom doesn't like that it's sucking the hydro bill dry. I hate sleeping in silence. My anxiety keeps me awake, dredging up the skeletons in my closet and cracking open my pandora's box of past crap I'll never get over. Oh, some of it is petty, like someone getting my name wrong, or kids calling me a "Sucky-Baby" when I was 8. The rest is the type of stuff that shapes you, and changes your view of the world. The tv fills the room with noise to distract me, helps me to crawl out of my body and be in the tv. After a few hours, I finally opened my door to see what's brewing in the kitchen, and my mom exclaims, "She has arisen!" I love my mom and her attempt at humor; she's my living Teddybear. As most Jamaican mom's cook, she whipped up some ackee, but for me, she left out the salt-fish, making it vegan [I've always hated fish anyway]. I toasted two bagel halves and draped the ackee over it to look like scrambled eggs. She use to worry that she couldn't make anything for me, but she tries her best. I can't love someone this much, can I? My dad jokingly claimed that he made it, and we just chuckled, awaiting mom to shout out, "I heard that!", and laugh along. If I avoid saying it'll be a good day, then I won't jinx it. I just tooled around on the computer, checking out other diary entries until my mom booted me off to see the lottery winnings, something I don't pay attention to myself[I'm THAT bad of a gambler]. Dad had gone out, so I assumed he went to work. While she was doing her hair, mom was puzzled and asked me why I'd lent dad $200 [mortgage], then $124.57 [phone bill], and for a moment, I blanked out and sat silently. My brain was protecting me from spilling the truth and making a Greek Tradgedy out of it: My parents get argumentative over money, and the last time I'd talked with my younger brother about them, we felt that money was stressing their marriage, and to avoid a divorce, he suggested that I chip in now and then. Not that I'd never thought of it, but until someone else voices the same thought, it seemed like a hasty idea. I'm bad with trusting my instincts and being too open. That's why I'm down 330 bucks that could've been used as my trip back to Vancouver. Oh well....... Dad arrived with some sandwiches from Mr.Submarine, a place I hadn't been to since I was 11, and my dad use to take my brothers and I there for a 12 incher or longer. I always worry when someone tries to order for me, possibly forgetting that a vegan avoids meat, dairy and eggs. Three simple things most people forget, and dad got it right! I was thrilled, yet my face didn't express it enough. I gave it a zap in the microwave and sat before the tv to catch, "Wrongfully Accused". I can always tell when a film is shot in Vancouver: 1)It usually never does very well at the box office, 2)I've worked with most of the visible background performers, and 3)the actors I know or know of have supporting roles. Anytime they have lead roles, then it's a purely Canadian production, at least a Vancouver one. It wasn't a bad movie, it was just a typical Leslie Nielson movie, which also isn't too bad. My mom needed help with her electronic organiser, so since it was similar to mine, I tried to do it for her, but she wanted to learn herself. She sat as I peered over her shoulder, leaning on her, draping my arm around her. I hate when she starts sentences with, "When I'm gone...", because then I actually have to think about such an ugly reality, and my Pisces brain won't go there. We all watched tv, and as dad got comfy in the love-seat, all stretched out, my mom poked me and said, "In 5 minutes, he'll be snoring". No less than that, the air was buzzing, sucking the ceiling into his nostril he was snoring so deeply! I exaggerate, of course. Well, I enjoyed a predominately gay episode of ,"The Simpsons" [I should've taped it too!] and was disappointed in, "Malcolm In The Middle". It's not as sharp as it use to be. This day went so smoothly; must've been the sunny sky shining some luck on us today. While Soaking in Lavendar... - Saturday, Apr. 06, 2019 He Reminded Me of An Incident Years Ago - Monday, Feb. 04, 2019 My Rose-Coloured Glasses are Smashed & I Don’t Want Them Anymore - Sunday, Feb. 03, 2019 It’s Been Awhile - Saturday, Feb. 02, 2019 I Never Needed You. - Thursday, Nov. 27, 2014
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