This occurred to me while riding the bus. While riding it, I kept remembering my dad yelling fag in my ear. Now, what am I suppose to think when someone calls me that? My own father? I think it's dumb to call a woman that; it's dumb to call anyone that, no matter how hip it is to throw that word around. I hate it as much as nigger. I hated even typing that word. I don't think much of anyone who uses that word, slipping it by me and justifying it, saying they heard it so often in videos and they know other "African-Americans" who say it with affection, so they don't see the problem [ I'm not from Africa and I'm not American. I'm of Jamaican descent born in Canada, so call me black, a'ight?] Well, I don't use it in my everyday language, and for them to use it is to test my reaction instead of simply asking what I think of the N-word [I had a friend who'd say the n word then look at me. I'd just look at him in disbelief and when he kept antagonising me with thatwork 2 more times, I pointed my finger in his face and shouted, "Don't you ever say that word again! You know what? A month later, he says, "I don't think I've said anything offensive to you." I was too shocked at that.] Here, my dad uses the word fag like he uses the word the. He feels anyone who is straight hates gays and that only gays hate homophobia. Well, there are straight people who know better than than, who would be offended at such an assumption.

Now I'm all fired up.

I was bushed when I got home from work. I was also sapped from being on the sandwich line and only having eating a banana all day. I almost passed out. The view sparkled and that's my signal to sit down. Luckily it was only quarter to 2, so I had 15 minutes until I'd leave. I focussed automatically on getting all the info flung at me so I'd get the sandwiches right and whatever problems I had were tucked away. I'm actually beginning to like my job. I actually like the people there. It's better than Wal-Mart as far as other employees go.

Also, most of my dreams, since working at Wendy's lately, have people dying or dead. Because my tv was on, Timothy Olyphant in the "Girl Next Door" movie promo was announced dead on one of those entertainment magazine shows. Last night, my younger brother was considered dead, but I was at his place last night, downloading Mahalia Jackson for my mom off his computer and taping "The L Word". Holy Provocations is all I can say about the opening sequence!

I'm glad I have tomorrow off.