My mind couldn't help but think: my mom passed this boy through her vagina, and he won't taste something that she might have touched!

Then I had another thought: Dennis Miller was on "Leno" months ago, commenting on a mother in a third world country who'd given birth to about 23 children. He says, "Come on people, it's a vagina, not a clown car!"

At the dinner table, I tried to contain my laughter. How would I explain my thought process without looking like I'd lost my mind?

Then, my parents started talking about an old neighbourhood we lived in, remembering a neighbour of ours. His name was Mr. Bonner, but I think it was Boner.

Again with the stifled laughter.

I felt like I was in grade 3 sitting in the back of the class hearing this. I wanted to turn to my younger brother and utter, "Boner!", but then I remembered: I'm 35, he's 34, we're too old for this.