Early this morning, I woke up, overhearing my parents talk about the 2-day old coffee, but not even the jist of it. After they left, I still felt antsy, felt irritable all over, and something needed to be done. I got up and washed the dishes. Yeah, it seemed odd, but once I was done, I fell asleep. The idea that simple house chores relieved stress and vented anger seemed like a renewed idea. I use to think excersize would do it, but that just brought up old baggage.

I later helped my mom wash her car, until my dad's friend swung by. He always wants my mom to go on the computer for him, to book flights out somewhere, but when he arrived, he was making small talk, acting like he was sincerely interested until he finally asked. I wasn't there when he did ask, but my mom went on the computer eventually, and it bugged me. I don't know, but he just seems to rub me the wrong way. I don't know what it would take for him to provoke me to unhospitable behaviour, but if I really don't like someone, and those people are rare, they'll see my frosty side. I didn't even chose to close off from him, like I didn't want any part of him to affect me. It's either my instincts or paranoia, but at some point one of them will say which is which. I think it was the time when long time ago, when I was only visiting Winnipeg while living in Vancouver, I had a one-way ride from a friend yet didn't know how I was to return back, so dad's friend offered to give me one. Cut to a moment later when my dad and I are alone in his car and he lashes out at me saying, "What's the matter with you? Don't you know any better than to be alone with him?" I'm thinking, why would my dad associate with someone who's a threat to his daughter? I'm assuming that my dad's friends are supposedly good people, but now I look at all of them like they're a threat to my sexuality. If one of them did lay a hand on me, I'd get blamed no matter how I defended myself, assumed unable, feeble and ignorant. It doesn't matter how hard you fight them off, if they overpower you, you're blamed and he's excused.