I decided, when I was around 12, that I didn't want people to judge me based on what was in front of them. It still urks me when people would say, "You mean, you don't have a mirror in your purse?", or, "I bet you like bowling and having sex orgies, eh?" (as one moron put it), or, "Do black people have dandruff?" I'm bombarded with stupid questions and ignorance. Also, labels don't explain everything about a person. Hell, I'm still discovering myself, five years at a time.

I like eye-candy: a person that looks so delicious, I want to eat them up. Whether they're male or female, it doesn't matter. I wonder if my sexuality figures into this? In my head, bisexuality seems ideal, until I have sex with someone. After having sex with a woman for the first time, my body clicked with that experience, but the rape a week later, by my neighbor, totalled my future sex life. The first girl I was with became a guy, a female-to-male transgendered person, and he had way too many issue, plus it was a new experience for me and it messed up my head for awhile. We are not who we have sex with. I use to think I was straight, but the guys I went for were eye-candy, transforming into cavity-causing junk food. I wanted an ideal, what I should have, neglecting what I really want, still thinking that my wants are disapproving to others. When that happens, I feel no support, then anger builds, and I feel resentful towards them. I get these feelings that who I am isn't important to anybody, it's their perception of me that is.