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I have an actor friend who's fretting about a film audition; he hasn't been keeping himself busy with acting classes or doing enough film work, so he's worried about his performance. He's even saying how I'm a pro [ha!] and that maybe he should be doing some theatre just to get active. He's jumping out of his skin. I'm almost expecting him to come onto me and seduce me. Me telling him not to worry isn't enough. Hell, just telling anyone not to feel what they're currently feeling is counterproductive, capisce? I see that look in his eye that my advice is useless and that he might regret hanging out with me. Anyway, he's a good guy. As attractive as he is, I can't help but think of how frustrating sex with men was. It was so long ago too. I was also thinking of the most important body part when it comes to having sex: hands. When you're intimate with someone, why only focus on one part? Why plant your hands on either side of my head or grasp onto me like you were hanging off a cliff and then wonder why I'm not hot or assume I came when I clearly didn't? I get all warmed up when someone's hands explore me, not just because they read it in a manual. Sometimes you can see a person thinking when they're having sex with you, seeing the instructions flit across their brains like they're detonating a bomb, hearing the pages turning as they recall The Joys of Sex manual. The last time I had sex, I remember my hands exploring her. I can't help it. It's like I'm blind and I want to remember every crevice of her, feel her skin, find out what makes her come. Ticklish spots are great because once the person relaxes, it feels good! She had a cough and felt stuffed up, so I went and got some Vick's Vapo-Rub and massaged it on her breasts. She was stoked, I could've gone on forever and I think we started up again. Sigh! Anyway, back to my actor friend. He has an apartment downtown and he took me there because he wanted to use his video camera and practice on-camera auditioning. I love gadgets! He got flustered over it and all I did was look at it and flick something. Or press something. Whatever it was, I solved the problem and he was good to go. One technique I like to do is, if I'm doing a two-person scene with someone, I like to switch characters, do the other person's lines while they do mine so I can see how they do it and get an idea of the other person's perspective. My actor friend did this and I was excited to do an on-camera read. I haven't auditioned for a film/tv project since June, so this felt good. I didn't have to worry about getting cast in the role, so I could relax. Anyway, this guy's place: it's as messy as mine! He's 40 and he's as normal [?] as I am! I could drag my family by their afros to his place and say, "Look! I'm not abnormal! Okay?" I felt relieved that his place was like this. Mine back in Vancouver was just as messy, only mine was much smaller. I love his building and his place. Old buildings rule! I don't know what it is about new buildings, but I prefer the old ones. He didn't apologise for the mess, I didn't comment on it. Places that are too tidy make me nervous. Clean freaks I distrust on a certain level. I fear judgement from them, that I'm some smelly hair-ball unclogged from a drain in comparison.
While Soaking in Lavendar... - Saturday, Apr. 06, 2019 He Reminded Me of An Incident Years Ago - Monday, Feb. 04, 2019 My Rose-Coloured Glasses are Smashed & I Don’t Want Them Anymore - Sunday, Feb. 03, 2019 It’s Been Awhile - Saturday, Feb. 02, 2019 I Never Needed You. - Thursday, Nov. 27, 2014
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