I dreamt of my older brother when he was younger with his afro, not shaved bald with a smudge of hair up front. He was asking questions, while occupied with some household chore, concerned about my well-being.

I miss him sometimes, but I get the feeling that he feels we haven't fully accepted him into our family. He was born in Jamaica, brought over when he was 9, while my younger brother and I were born here. He seems to have some anger issues towards our parents. My mom thinks she's a bad parent because he hardly keeps in touch and I had to reassure her that that's not so. He makes excuses not to visit us and doesn't even phone on our birthdays. I even reminded him the day before mine and he said he'd do something, and even when I suggested an e-greeting, I still got sqwat from him. At least he sent us X-mas gifts.

What does he have against me? Unless he's being a jerk about the whole lesbian thing, I can't see what his problem is.

I hope he's okay out in Ontario. I think the dream was reassuring me that he still cares and thinks about me.