It's not as harsh as Vancouver, but if I don't acknowledge another black person, they give me a dirty look, especially the men. They will wag their fingers in my face rudely, thinking they're getting through to me when really I've lost respect for their finger-wagging. The black lesbians are a little cold towards me, but they need a little warming up. Never assume a black woman is stuck up. She's put up with men who want her to put-out, then when she doesn't she's labelled a bitch. If she does put-out, she gets even more disrespect. It's a lose-lose situation. Vancouver was terrible for that, or so I thought. I was on the bus several months ago, and I sat behind this other brother. He forgot something and had to leave the bus for a second, so he asks a white woman to hold his stuff for him, totally keeping his back to me. It might've had nothing to do with me. I hope it didn't, but people can be so indirect sometimes. Sometimes when a white woman is with her black boyfriend, he glares at me, like I'm the reason he's with her. What happened to loving someone for who they are? What's up with the adgenda?

On the other side, I was at a cafe with a white friend of mine, and a black man waved at me. When I waved back, she got all indignant, like I was alienating her for being white. I'm screwed either way. Can't escape the whole color thing, not even from your own people.

I've never been with a black guy during my heterosexual career, and now, I've never had a black woman, yet. There was an older one, sixteen years older, that I had a crush on, but she had a cantankerous side to her. Really, I was intimidated by her because she so was hot. I feel so stupid for not getting together with her now, but before I moved here, I found a movie set that I knew she was a Set Dresser for, and said I was leaving for Winnipeg. The guy behind us said, "I'd rather have a dollar in Vancouver than a million in Winnipeg", and as I regretted my choice, I gave her a hug and a kiss, on the cheek. As I walked away, I blew her a kiss and she blew me one back. I've got her address and mailed her a letter, but it came back Return To Sender: the stamp came off!