[Saturday, Oct. 01, 2005 @ 12:19 a.m.]
[ Get There & Be Good ]

I suck!
During rehearsals, I've been feeling like a crappy actor. The work makes me feel incompetent and uncoordinated. It's frustrating. I mean, how often do I do a show where I get frustrated about my abilities? Everytime!
A few other thoughts went through my mind though. Despite the first sentence of this entry, the other thought was get there. I needed to get to a place where I was self-assured and not second-guessing what to do next. Instead of feeling ill-prepared, I approach the project with more enthusiasm and chase away the doubt plaguing me.

With that aside, I'm thinking of the wedding I'm attending in several hours. One of my cousins is getting married. Him and his girlfriend/fiance already have a baby, but they're making it official now. My mom met up with me after work after I'd made an appointment with her. After days of "Did you find a dress yet? Do you know what you're going to wear?", I broke out my notepad the scribbled in the time and place for us to meet so we could browse. I had this one place picked out because the style looked classy and elegant. They were expensive, but you can always count on a discount rack, eh? The sales lady helped my mom and I and chose a few items. Only one of the dresses was under a hundred bucks, but since I got paid for doing background performance work, I had some cash to spare. The saleslady tried to hookwink me into buying some rhinestone earrings and other things, but other than the dress, I ended up getting two pairs of pantyhose. Seeing my pantyline through the dress was unsightly! Anyway, the dress looked red-carpet worthy, oscar-worthy even. Just basic black. I'm worried how cold it'll be, since any jacket will ruin the look. Anyway, I'm beginning to think it's not the type of dress to wear to a wedding, but another part of me figured I could wear it elsewhere and look hot. It's the type of dress where you know eyes will bug out or necks will get sprained.

Anyway, words to memorize, moves to practice and heads to turn.


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