[Thursday, Jan. 27, 2005 @ 9:45 a.m.]
[ The Night Cured The Day. ]

The day started of alright. Whenever I walk into work and I see the head honcho sitting at one of the tables, I know it'll be a tense day. The GM gets on our backs about everything that's policy, things that didn't matter before when the guy from head office isn't present. They and a couple of the employees were pissing me right off. I had images of punching something, or someone, but when I got in the backroom, I kicked a chair in the corner to alleviate my anger. When the GM and the big cheese corrected me for the 3rd time about asking customers for a coke as opposed to a drink, I spewed my opinions, feeling my anger on the tip of my tongue. My boss was concerned and surprised to "see this side of you" he says. It made me aware that as dramatic as people accuse me of being, I hate showing my real feelings when they get to a point of being provoked. I hate showing my anger and letting out other passionate feelings in public. I guess that's why I'd rather do it on stage and before a camera, but sometimes I have trouble in that area.
Later on, I met up with my actor's group. At first I didn't think anyone would show, except me and another guy, but a few people rolled in. Even a few hours later, a few more came and the conversation turned to sex. It got rawdy, with the amount of booze in some of us. One girl had some pot and we went to another member's place to smoke up. One guy was doing his impression of the guy from "Napolean Dynamite" and we couldn't stop laughing. Before I knew it, it was after 1am! Luckily I got a right from one of the girls, who I gave a back massage to. I'm sitting on her ass, getting my jollies on this curvatious young thing, restraining myself to not take advantage of her, but I realized I'd never do a thing like that, especially since she expressed she was straight, but I'd make a fool of myself in front of the others. Anyway, everytime I drink or smoke pot, I worry I'll be detected by my parents. I hate that I have to think about stupid shit like this. I'm too old for this and it's driving me crazy. I had to phone and leave a message home that I'm okay!

Anyway, I have to get ready for work.


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